I’m in a funk.

If I’m not working, I wake up in the morning between 7 and 7:30. Take my kid to school. I am home by 8:20.

I then proceed to sit on my butt at my desk and do nothing but surf the web, mainly while trolling Facebook and Twitter, and do absolutely NOTHING useful. For about 4-5 hours. Then I eat. Then I come home and do it again. Oh my God, it’s the worst feeling. I mean, I hate having to bow to pressure and deadlines and deal with bureaucracy (most jobs/work), but the feeling of absolute sloth at doing nothing feels awful. Really, really, REALLY AWFUL.

As I laid out in this post at the end of 2017, I had some goals for the coming year:

  • 30 day goal: Journal every single day.
  • 60 day goal: I’d like to work hard on my eating.
  • 90 day goal: Break a sweat for 30 minutes every damn day.
  • 120 day goal: Money.
  • 150 day goal: Focus on clutter.
  • 180 day goal: Start doing some serious photography again.

I totally kicked that 30 day goal’s ass. I know I have a week left in January, but I started journaling the last week of December, so I’m very happy with how that goal turned out. It was my only real “resolution” for 2018.

I gave up drinking, too, and have mainly focused on my eating. So for my 30-60 day goal, which included those two items, I think I’m going to scrap them and update this 60 day goal to be one of reducing screen time. I sincerely feel that will make my life so much better and make those other goals more sustainable.

To do this, I have an app on my computer: Self-Control. I also have an app on my phone: Forest. Self-Control is much more draconian. You can’t shut it off, even with a reboot. Forest is nicer…it uses positive reinforcement. Obviously, Self-Control is much more effective. LOL

As I get into the end of January, I’ll start to come up with a schedule, set boundaries, make plans and really focus on cutting back on screen time. It’s having a negative effect on my mental and physical health and it’s totally freaking useless! Okay, honestly, it’s not all useless. I have to be honest here. When my son was super duper sick in elementary school, I had to stay at home with him and I couldn’t leave the house. At all. It was my absolute lifeline. I don’t know what I would have done without social media back then. But now…I have multiple social outlets and I do get to work most days if I want to. I have a lot more of a support network than I did. It’s better. (Now that I’m thinking about it, thinking back to that time when he was in the hospital…I have lots of feelings about it that I really need to write about. Yay, journaling!) But anyway…right now, social media is killing my health and making me grumpy. I will reduce it and make it a force for good. Fingers crossed!

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