Deep Thoughts

I want to say I am “so resistant” to working out and eating well right now, but I think the mental changes are slowly happening behind the scenes. The hardest part, though, is the dealing with my family (my spouse, my son, my parents who are in town). Not in an emotional sense, but in a routine/habit sense. I don’t want to change their lives to change my own. My parents are only visiting for 10 days, so it’s not that big of a deal with them. But with my son and hubby, I don’t want to cook something that’s amazing and tasty that they will eat that happens to be full of carbs (or whatever) that I can’t eat without gaining weight (or at least not losing weight).

I think this gets into that whole thing where women find themselves all of the time. We take care of others, we want them to be happy, but to overhaul our lives often takes making other people slightly uncomfortable. And because we’re so prone to wanting to connect with others, we don’t want to do that.

I’m currently reading this book about how women communicate. It talks about how men and women are designed for both connection and competition. Ultimately, it’s a spectrum for both of the sexes. But for women, we mostly do the connection thing, because that’s how we evolved over the millennia. If women didn’t connect with their extended family and their children, we wouldn’t have survived as a species long term, regardless of the fact that many women don’t even have children now and work in competitive jobs and industries. So we don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable, because that makes us less connected and more competitive, and we just don’t want to do that. Men get a free pass. They’re encouraged to do the work to get ahead and leave their families behind if they need to, to give their families the best thing out there. For women, we’re seen as horrible if we abandon our families.

The thing I’m going to work on this week is recognizing that I can take steps to improve my health that aren’t “abandoning my family”. And that if I take care of myself, it’s only good for my family, because I’m a better mom/wife that way.

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